Union
by Tribal Shimmy
Summary: Here is an entire 25 page story for Christmas. I tried to put it in to chapters but believe it reads better as a one-off story. It does contain sex scenes so please do not read it if this would offend. Dedicated to Veronica. Happy Christmas everyone!


It had been fifteen days since he said the words; fifteen days since he had regretted saying them. Knowing, if he could live the moment again, he would not have said what he had said. The moment, the words had left his lips, he knew his mistake.

The excuses, he had allowed himself, rang through his head. That he was already in a foul temper that day. That Craterus and Hephaistion knew better than to fight. That drawing their swords on each other, actually coming to blows, was intolerable. All valid excuses, but he still could not forgive himself.

"Without me you are nothing."

He whispered the words now, trying to convey them in a tone that would not make them so hurtful. He was alone, no-one could hear him. Not like fifteen days ago when the army had heard his words. When Hephaistion reacted as though he had been struck by him. The pain, he had caused, radiating from his eyes.

He'd been ready with a put down for Craterus too, but found himself unable to say it, not while he gazed on Hephaistion and realised what he had done. What he had said.

Having to force himself to carry on, he had rebuked them both. They needed to hear it. The army needed to hear it. But his eyes had not left Hephaistion's, until Hephaistion had been the one to look away.

"To have taken my words back then, would have made me look weak," he said, rehearsing what he had wanted to say, since that moment. "Hephaistion, I'm sorry."

Standing up, he went to pour himself a cup of wine. Suddenly aware of Bagoas, lurking in the shadows, he signalled for him to go. Had it been so much of a punishment to be alone in his bed at night? The eunuch was no substitute, Roxanne had no love in her.

He laughed to himself, then took another sip of wine. It was funny how you would only realise what you had when it was gone. It was a physical pain that would not leave him. He welcomed it, he deserved to be punished for not thinking before he spoke.

Late afternoon. He found himself with no interest in anything…except Hephaistion. He sat back down on the chair, resting his feet up on a low stool, then sighed and leaned his head back, lost in thought.

He had seen Craterus privately. Refusing to listen to the cause of the argument, to any reasons that the man might offer for harsh words to become a physical attack. Having warned Craterus he then had Hephaistion join them, insisting the two settled their differences, on pain of death if they argued again.

The apologies did not come easily, neither man making eye contact as the words were spoken, before a reluctant embrace.

Craterus had offered a meek smile to him then, turning from Hephaistion to bow before him. Hephaistion had stepped back, waiting quietly before being dismissed, saying nothing, the pain still burning in his eyes.

It was not as if he had not tried to set things right. He had apologised the next morning when the officers met. They had all heard him say that he was wrong to speak so. Hephaistion had nodded his acceptance of the apology but it had not made things right between them. He left with the others and only returned when sent for, only to be sent away when it was clear they would argue if he stayed.

He had cut Hephaistion deeply. He knew it, he just did not know how to heal the wound.

Three days after, when reports came, of the threat of an uprising, he had sent Hephaistion, with Perdiccas, thinking that time apart might help. The truth was that it was killing him inside to have Hephaistion be so distant with him. He needed the time to come to terms with what he had lost.

**OOXXOO**

Alexander's thoughts were disturbed by Ptolemy, whose greeting to the guard let him know of his approach.

Hesitating, assessing his mood, Ptolemy came to him, only stopping to pour himself some wine.

"Perdiccas and Hephaistion have returned. Apparently, all went well, there will be no uprising." He took a sip of his wine.

Alexander nodded but said nothing.

Ptolemy paused before speaking, as if he were thinking of what best to say. "I thought you were coming to see the new recruits being drilled," he said.

Alexander took a moment before replying, not bothering to look at Ptolemy. "Are they shaping up well?" he asked.

"They'll do," Ptolemy replied, "but it might have made them work harder to see you watching, Alexander."

Shrugging his shoulders, Alexander put down his wine. "I can watch them tomorrow, and the day after that. It makes no odds."

Ptolemy sighed. "Even the men who dig the latrines know the dark mood you're in and the reason for it."

Alexander shook his head. "I'm tired of thinking on it."

"Then think of something else," Ptolemy snapped, finally getting a reaction as Alexander looked at him and smiled.

Alexander lifted his cup again, taking a long drink of the wine, before he spoke.

"So, how are the preparations for the New Year festivities coming along?"

Ptolemy grinned, "Some men, from Seleucus' troop, have been rehearsing a drama they hope to please you with. One of them fancies himself as a playwright and has come up with a story concerning the battle of Issus. I stopped and watched them at rehearsals. It won't win any prizes, but it was entertaining enough."

"And who takes my part?" asked Alexander, leaning forward, showing his interest.

"A young lad, I don't know the name of, though he seems nervous of his lines and kept arguing that he was afraid to say them before you. There is another to play Hephaistion. They show him at your side. How much he means to you," Ptolemy's voice softened. "It's what they see. What they know."

Alexander nodded. "And who plays you?"

"I do not know. Perhaps, I do not deserve a mention. I should write a play of my own where I am the hero, then pick some fine looking actor to take the lead."

"Leave it to others to write of you," Alexander replied and smiled again, feeling his melancholy mood lifting a little.

Ptolemy laughed. "If I left it to others then I would be a forgotten man. I don't just keep a journal for my old age, Alexander. I hope some day it reminds people of all that we've achieved."

"When you write of me, Ptolemy, be sure to show Hephaistion by my side. Promise me you won't neglect to show how much he means to me."

"He'll come round," Ptolemy said, taking a drink of his wine. "Just give him time."

The guard were heard to salute and then Craterus appeared, looking pleased with himself. He greeted Alexander, then came over to Ptolemy and slapped him on the back, before going to pour himself a cup of wine.

"I thought supper might be ready," he said.

"You're early," Ptolemy noted.

Craterus looked over at Alexander. "I've had a good days hunting. You should have come. There's such a variety of game here. The land's rich, and beautiful - now that it's stopped raining."

Alexander stood up, stretching himself. It had begun to annoy him that Craterus still went about as if nothing had happened. Seleucus had been there when the argument erupted, he had since told him that Craterus spoke the first harsh word, struck the first blow. He had goaded Hephaistion about his achievements, how they were not earned on merit.

If he had only known at the time. His words had only compounded what Craterus had said. Confirming the slander.

"I need some air," he said. "Ask a page to organise the supper. I will be back soon enough."

With that he left, making his way through the camp alone, heading to Hephaistion's tent. Even with the distance between them, he could still more find more comfort in Hephaistion's presence than with anybody else. He would hope that time had healed the rift. If it had not, then he would have to learn to deal with it.

There was laughter and song around the camp. The men were all looking forward to the festival. They had built makeshift temples to the gods, carrying in branches to adorn these temples, the skilled amongst them put to carving images of the Dionysos, Zeus, Apollo and the rest.

They greeted Alexander with ready smiles and he took the time to talk with them, to encourage them in their pursuits and laugh with them at the stories they told, promising to come to them when the feast began the next day.

He was aware of Perdiccas walking over to him, waiting for him, and excused himself to go and talk to him.

"Ptolemy told me you were back."

"I was just coming to give you my report," Perdiccas replied,

Alexander nodded. "How did it go?"

Perdiccas laughed. "I've seen Hephaistion be more diplomatic. It was as if he was looking for a battle. He just marched in and said that if they wanted a fight they could have one. He said it so fiercely that they instantly backed down, then agreed to send ten elephants as a tribute, with more to follow if needed."

"If the problem was solved so quickly, why did it take so long for you to return?"

Perdiccas' face flushed, and he turned to gaze in the direction of Hephaistion's tent. "We were offered hospitality and thought it best to stay and make sure there would be no further trouble."

Hephaistion had not wanted to return. That's what Perdiccas was saying. He had delayed.

"Am I such a tyrant?" he asked Perdiccas.

Perdiccas shook his head. "He hasn't been himself. He's hardly eaten and he's drunk too much. I tried to talk to him but he would just change the subject." Perdiccas looked away, considering whether or not to say more. He sighed. "He knows what people think. All these years. All this time. On his own, he would have achieved much, I'm sure. They just don't see that, and if you ask me it is because they are jealous of the love you hold for him."

Alexander looked over to his own tent. "I have Ptolemy and Craterus waiting on supper. Will you join us?"

Perdiccas looked down at the clothes he wore. "I need a bath. Let me go and freshen up and I will come and join you."

Alexander embraced Perdiccas, then let him go before going to see Hephaistion.

As he approached his tent he hesitated, thinking of what he might say, what he should do. He was aware that the soldiers had stopped their work, that he was being watched. Taking a deep breath he stepped inside, only to find himself alone.

The interior of the tent was in perfect order, and Alexander could not help but smile to see it that way. Hephaistion left it the same every time he was called away. No unfinished papers on the desk, no item not in its place and yet it was undoubtedly Hephaistion's tent. His favourite writings, his armour, his cloak folded neatly on top of a chest, his scent.

Alexander looked at the bed, remembering nights when he lay with Hephaistion upon it, though he could not remember the last time. The eagerness and laughter of their youth, the constant desire, had been replaced with quiet love-making all too infrequent in its occurrence.

He considered waiting, then realised he did not know where Hephaistion could have gone. There were no pages to ask, though some should have been waiting to be summoned, for any task that needed doing.

Hearing hurried footsteps approaching he stepped outside, only to practically bump in to Odius, one of Hephaistion's troop, who had been about to step inside.

"I heard that you were here," Odius blustered. "I've been looking for you."

"Well, you found me. What is it?"

Odius looked in to the tent as if he might see his general, frowning when he saw it empty. "Hephaistion has gone."

Alexander felt as if a knife had gone in to his heart, but Odius next words calmed him a little.

"He's gone up to the falls. Alone. I said we should go with him, but he would not hear of it."

"How long has he been gone?"

Odius was right to be concerned. Although most of the surrounding area had been judged safe, there was always danger. For a man as important as Hephaistion, for the value in holding him hostage, or for the prestige of killing him, the danger was higher.

The falls, where he had gone to, had been found as they arrived, close to where they would set up camp. It was a circle of high rocks, where water poured down in the centre, forming a pool at the bottom, from which a river ran, cascading down, through the only entry, then out in to the open countryside. It settled then, providing water for the camp.

The falls were certainly beautiful. A peaceful oasis, with trees and fragrant, flowering plants lush and green, a natural path sloping down towards the water. Here there was an open space, where you could stand and feel as if you were alone in all the world.

Only there was also danger. This newly conquered land still had its perils. If not from enemies, from snakes and wild animals.

"I ran to find you as he left. Nobody knew where you had gone. It took me a while before I was told you were here," Odius replied, looking to Alexander to take action.

Not hesitating Alexander responded. "Call up Hephaistion's regiment, have my bodyguard fetched, and have them bring Bucephalus."

"Bucephalus?"

Alexander smiled. He knew why Odius was asking. The stallion was practically retired. Seldom ridden now. "Bucephalus," he repeated.

Leaving Odius issuing orders he headed back to his own tent about to tell his companions there what was happening. He thought better of it when he saw Craterus. Simply offering his apologies that he would not be attending supper. That they should go on without him.

He hurried through his tent, pulling the furs from off his bed, fetching his sword, then reaching in to a small wooden chest and taking something wrapped in silk.

Appearing back in his main quarters he caught Ptolemy and Craterus exchanging glances. He said nothing and went outside to see Bucephalus being trotted up by a page, leading him.

Alexander smiled to see the old horse's excitement. He was always ready for anything. Always willing.

He took the reins and told the boy to go and fetch food from the cook and be quick about it. Then he threw the furs over Bucephalus' withers, fixed his sword and leaped on to the stallion's back.

Perdiccas appeared, not yet having taken his bath, but no doubt having been told that his king was on the move. Seleucus ran up with Leonnatus following.

"Where are you going?" Seleucus asked.

The page ran back, a bag in hand and passed it up to Alexander.

"To Hephaistion," he replied, turning away, pushing Bucephalus forward. His bodyguard were waiting, he made his way through the camp, to Hephaistion's regiment and then led the way to the falls.

**OOXXOO**

It was not far to get to, although the sun was beginning to set as they got there.

Alexander halted at the opening, looking up at the high rocks which formed the circle. He turned to gaze on the river, low now the rain had stopped. The roar from it had quietened as the water levels fell, he supposed they would be long gone before it roared again.

The track to the falls lay along the river, up a gentle slope. He would go there alone.

He turned and gave orders for the men to wait. To guard, but not enter. He noticed the smiles from some.

Odius brought his horse forward and spoke quietly so he might not be heard by those around him, except for Alexander.

"There is the feast tomorrow," he said.

Alexander smiled. He had expected some words of wisdom, but had not expected to be speaking to Odius' stomach.

"I will be back before then," he replied. "You have rations with you?"

Odius nodded.

"Send back for more if you need to. But keep watch around here."

"I will," Odius replied, firmly.

Alexander turned and rode along the river, in to the shadow of the high rocks, Bucephalus picking his way along the rock filled path, until they entered the circle.

The scent of flowers met him, thick and exotic they seemed to hang from every branch. Tall trees shaded him, and he brought Bucephalus to a halt as he saw Hephaistion, dismounting softly, saying nothing, but keeping his distance, crouching down and watching instead.

Hephaistion stood, looking up at the falls, which shimmered down from their lofty height, like they might stop at any moment. The water glistened pink in the setting sun and hit the tranquil pool below, sounding like a bird in flight.

He wore a chiton and his old cavalry boots, the same as he had worn at Pella, that he swore were old but comfortable. A braided leather belt was round his waist, his dagger held by it. He looked as he always had at Mieza, at Pella, in the beginning of their campaign.

Alexander had not been seen. Hephaistion had his back to him. He stood now, wanting to go to him, but hid himself again as a tune began to echo around the rocks.

Hephaistion was singing, a wordless tune, a hunting song, from back at Mieza. He sang a few of the notes, listening to them echoed back at him, then he laughed as if delighted with the reply.

Alexander grinned to hear him, stopping himself from laughing too. Now was not the time to be discovered. He had never seen Hephaistion like this.

Hephaistion kicked off his boots, stepping up to the edge of the water. He sang the tune again, his voice melodic and strong. It echoed back to him, but this time he did not stop. He held his arms out at his sides and began to dance.

Slowly at first, as if he was remembering the steps, he grape-vined from left to right and then from right to left. Then he clicked his thumb and forefingers of each hand to the beat he was creating and grapevined from left to right again, but faster this time, his feet raising higher, more definite in their path.

Alexander watched entranced. Roxanne and Bagoas had danced for him, seduced him, made him lose his way. Here, thinking he was unwatched, was Hephaistion and he was suddenly, painfully reminded of all they had and what he could have lost.

The tune became a song, as Hephaistion found the words.

"It's a soldier's life, the love of war. Leaving battle scars and your body sore. Advance the phalanx, push back, push on. Then with victory, march on, march on.

It's a soldier's life to do as you're told. Through summer heat and winter's cold.

Follow the king and wherever you roam, remember Macedonia is still your home."

Alexander stood, advancing, singing Hephaistion's siren song.

"And will I be killed by a spear or a sword, by a fire-lit arrow…"

Hephaistion turned, and there was silence as he gazed on Alexander. Then he changed the lyric, speaking it,. "…or an angry word?."

Alexander stopped in his tracks. This bearded Hephaistion still held pain in his eyes. He felt the pain as deeply, felt tears stinging his own eyes.

Hephaistion pressed his lips together, sighed deeply, then stepped towards him, taking him in a warm embrace.

With relief flooding through him. Alexander held Hephaistion tightly, soaking in the sensation of having the man, he loved more than life, so close again. He never wanted to let go. Hephaistion must have felt the same, he clutched at Alexander's chiton, pulling him even closer, his face brushed against his own, he felt his breath upon his neck.

"You hurt me," Hephaistion whispered.

The tears brimmed over Alexander's eyes. "I know. I know," he murmured.

Hephaistion felt the wetness of the tears, he pulled his head back, his lapis eyes looking in to Alexander's grey. He smiled. "Even when you hurt me, even when I felt so angry towards you, the love was still there, Alexander. I love you. If you said a thousand hurtful things, I still would. It's all I know to do."

"I hurt us both with my words," Alexander replied. "If you only knew the times I have berated myself since then. I missed you. I thought that I had lost you."

"I just needed some time," Hephaistion said, smiling and ruffling Alexander's hair. "I've done a lot of thinking in the past few days. About us. About the past. I resolved to put this right. There is too much between us after all.

Alexander pulled his love in to his embrace. Still needing to feel him close. "I wonder what god entwined our lives?" he asked. "I felt so lost without you. That I could not go on if you were not by my side. I am so sorry."

"You were the King that day. The King spoke those words. The King glared at me, seeking my acceptance. My submission to his will. My forgiveness. Now I see that Alexander is before me. My Alexander. I cannot be angry any more."

Alexander laughed, feeling the vice that had gripped his heart relaxing. Things could be right again. All was not lost. He stepped back, needing to see Hephaistion's face, his thumb brushing against the beard.

"You should not be here alone," he said.

Hephaistion shrugged. "It appears I am not. Though shouldn't you have your guard with you?"

Turning, as if he might see where they were positioned, Alexander replied. "I have. They wait outside, with the men from your regiment."

"My men are tired, Alexander," Hephaistion chided softly.

"They are resting now. They have food," Alexander replied, looking for Bucephalus and calling him over.

The stallion cantered stiffly, halting in front of Alexander. Hephaistion went over to the horse, stroking his neck.

"Hello, old friend," he murmured, rubbing the stallion's face, pretending not to notice the mass of grey that appeared when his forelock was raised.

"He's getting old," Alexander said, softly, as if he feared the gods would hear him and remember that the stallion had stayed too long with him.

Hephaistion smoothed the forelock over Bucephalus' face, hiding the grey. He smiled over at Alexander, aware that he would deny the change, cling to the memory of when Bucephalus could gallop all day long and still be ready to race through the night. He looked at the furs on the stallion's back.

"Are you planning to stay the night?" he asked, biting his lip and looking at Alexander, obviously keen to hear his answer.

"I don't know what I was thinking," Alexander replied. He stepped over and removed the bag. "I had some food brought, Perdiccas said that you had not been eating." He felt the weight of it. "I think there is wine here too."

Hephaistion looked over to the pool. "I only came here to bathe." He rubbed his hand along his beard. "And to shave. I was going to come and see you then."

"When your dance was done?" Alexander could not resist asking it, he grinned as he said it.

Hephaistion let his arm slip around Alexander's waist, and led him to the edge of the pool. With his free hand he pointed out the rocks.

"Doe this not remind you, a little, of Mieza? I thought it from the first. The rock is about as high, and the water, the greenery…"

"But no buildings, no guards…" Alexander laughed, still giddy with the relief that all was well once more. "Yes, I can see Mieza, more than anywhere we've ever been."

"We used to escape. Remember? We'd leave those buildings, sneak away from the guards, and taste our freedom, Alexander. Just the two of us. And we both would dance, for the dreams we shared." Hephaistion turned to Alexander, his eyes seeking something in Alexander's. "For the love we shared."

"And you miss those days?" Alexander asked the question solemnly.

Hephaistion considered the answer, looking out across the pool, over to the falls. Slowly, he nodded his head. "I miss the times we were alone. Like this."

"Do you regret what we have done?" It almost hurt to ask the question. He knew he would get nothing but an honest answer. It had always been Hephaistion's way, right from the start.

Hephaistion smiled, then leaned over to kiss Alexander gently on the cheek. "No. I don't regret it. They were my dreams too, remember. Just…I thought, we would always find the time to be alone. To just be. And look at us now, look how large the army is you lead, how many people follow, and they all demand your time…my time. There are things which have to be done, we cannot always be together, not even the nights are ours now." He sighed. "You have a wife. You need a son. I am not always here for you, I know that. If you have lain with others, I understand it," he put his hand to his heart, "but that hurts too."

"You are more to me than anything," Alexander said, fervently.

"I know," Hephaistion whispered, without hesitation. He released Alexander. "I need to bathe," he said, and began to undress.

Alexander turned and went back to Bucephalus, pulling the furs down from the horse's back then removing the bridle. He gathered the furs, laying them down on a level piece of ground close to the water. He brought the bag there, checking inside to see that a small banquet had been provided.

This done, he looked to see Hephaistion swimming in the water and, not able to resist, he stripped off his own clothing and went to join him.

The days had been hot, the water felt warm, the pink glow from the setting sun made the place seem magical, a place where the gods would idle away their time. Here he could be anyone. He could be a goatherd, not a King. But whoever he was he knew it would be Hephaistion he chose to love. He felt a freedom here, as he reached Hephaistion and touched hands with him, they might have been boys back at Mieza.

Hephaistion splashed water at him, then turned and began to swim fast towards the falls. It was a race and Alexander took the invitation and struck out after him.

Allowing for the lead Hephaistion had, and the fact that he could swim like a dolphin, Alexander felt he had not done so badly, when he saw that Hephaistion was just beginning to climb out of the water.

Hephaistion turned and grinned, bending down and holding out his hand so that Alexander could take it. Then he laughed, as he had anticipated that Alexander would try to pull him back in the water, and managed to resist the tug.

Alexander got to his feet, looking up at the cascading water, as Hephaistion took his hand and led him round it, until they were standing in a cave looking through the water's veil, at their horses grazing peacefully.

"I don't think you could stand here when the rains occur," Hephaistion said, looking up to the jagged rocks above them. "It's only because the water levels have fallen."

Alexander looked back at the extent of the cave behind them. For a moment the thought struck him that they could spend the night here, but then he realised the floor was too uneven.

"You couldn't sleep for the noise," Hephaistion laughed, reading his mind.. "This small cave echoes the sound too much."

"Alexander and Hephaistion!" Alexander shouted, then grinned and shouted, "Alexander loves Hephaistion!"

His words echoed for a moment then were gone. Alexander opened his mouth to speak the words again, but Hephaistion silenced him with a kiss.

Alexander groaned in to it, clutching his love to him, deepening it, trying to convey all of his feelings in that one kiss. He wanted more, he wanted Hephaistion to lie down so that he could claim him, he wanted to lie down so that Hephaistion could take him. He might have thought he had lost the right to touch, but here was Hephaistion offering himself, opening himself to love, to friendship.

Stepping back, Hephaistion took Alexander with him, under the falls. The water hit their bodies, pulsing with their desire. This urgent need between them. Like when they were boys. He needed Hephaistion more than he needed air to breathe. He felt himself turning, then falling backwards.

Hephaistion had dived in to the water, taking him with him. Any words of admonishment, he might have spoken, lost in the noise of the water, he laughed, then gave chase, swimming back to the shore.

Laughing, Hephaistion waded out of the water and fell on to the furs, propping himself up on to his elbows, watching him, his body not concealing his desire.

Alexander fell on to his knees, on the furs, shaking his head, splashing water across Hephaistion's body, loving the sight of the tight muscles flexing as the droplets landed. He let himself fall in to a welcome embrace, rolling to his side, pulling Hephaistion with him, kissing him, exploring, before offering himself in urgent need.

Gazing in to his eyes, Hephaistion sought unneeded permission, before entering his body. Claiming what was freely offered, knowing it was a part of the apology, that Alexander's guilt would still linger, that amends would still be made, as always.

Alexander somehow knew that Hephaistion only intended to savour the sensations of their coupling and then draw back. But he encouraged him, his climax was coming quickly, he did not want to lose the moment, to lose the feelings that were beginning to overwhelm him.

He groaned and craned his head back, arching his back to increase the feeling. He glanced at Hephaistion, knowing that only with him could he be this open, could he ever submit. Then he was lost, reaching up to pull Hephaistion forward, clinging to him like a drowning man, finding his lips and kissing him deeply, trying to say with a kiss the words he could not always find.

Lying back on the furs. Breathless. He was aware of Hephaistion lying beside him. Of his arm across his waist. Holding him. He heard his ragged breathing and smiled. Opening his eyes he saw the stars lit against the blue, mauves and pinks of the evening sky.

This was where he wanted to be. What he had been searching for. Hephaistion. He had been here all along.

The sudden clarity made sense. He had needed to come this far to realise that what he sought was with him all the time.

He turned to Hephaistion, kissing the perfect face, then closed his eyes, seeing him in every moment of their lives together. He knew what he desired now and had to claim it.

"Marry me," he murmured.

Hephaistion laughed and placed a kiss on his cheek. "I can give you no sons, Alexander."

He reached for Hephaistions's hand, lifting himself up to gaze down on the man he loved, hoping to let him see how serious he was with his proposal. "A while ago, I was asked by a Persian lord about men loving men. I forget how it came about, but he asked if the Greek men marry each other. He had heard of the Sacred Band and thought that it might have been the case there."

"I would gain nothing more than I have now," Hephaistion said, reaching up to run his fingers down the side of Alexander's face. "We love each other. That is enough for me."

Alexander shook his head. "I should never have married Roxanne…"

"You need a son. If Roxanne can not give you that then you should marry again. You know I favoured Stateira…"

This time Alexander silenced Hephaistion with a kiss. "Marry me," he said again, hearing the pleading in his voice.

Hephaistion stared at him, considering his request, then he nodded his head in consent.

Alexander laughed with joy, not realising he had been holding his breath.

"But here," Hephaistion said. "I know you would marry me in front of the whole army, Alexander. But if we are to wed, then let it be here, just between the two of us."

Alexander looked up to the stars. "Before the gods then, if no-one else."

Hephaistion smiled and then got to his feet. "We should bathe."

Knowing this to be the beginning of the marriage ceremony, Alexander nodded. "I want to make some garlands first."

He reached for the bag, emptying out it's contents. Finding two roast partridges, some cheese, wine, fruit, some bread and a flask of wine. He was also pleased to see two flints so that he could light a fire.

Standing up he was happy to locate some ivy, then picked some flowers and quickly made garlands for them to wear. When he returned with them he saw that Hephaistion had been busy fetching wood, and already had a fire started.

Feeeling a mixture of nervousness and excitement he took Hephaistion's hand and walked back in to the water with him. They washed each other, in silence, then he watched as Hephaistion shaved his beard.

He had not felt so nervous when he had married Roxanne, and not half as much in love. A love which had quickly faded. When Hephaistion was done shaving he leaned forward and sought a kiss.

The first part of the ceremony was done. Together they walked from the water and went over to the furs, kneeling down upon them, facing each other, close to the fire. Alexander took one of the garlands and placed it on Hephaistion's head, then Hephaistion took the other and placed it upon his.

Alexander took Hephaistion's dagger, and staring in to Hephaistion's lapis eyes he sliced off a lock of his own hair, then leaned forward to cut a lock of Hephaistion's.

Entwining the two locks together he kissed them and then threw them in to the fire. "For Aphrodite," he said.

Hephaistion reached for some figs and dates, throwing them upon the fire. "For Peitho," he said, and smiled.

Alexander reached for Hephaistion's hand.

"Let the gods witness our love, Hephaistion. For truly I shall never love another as I do you. I choose to marry you, putting you above all others. I have loved you from the first and I shall love you to the end. I promise you this."

Hephaistion lifted up his hand and kissed it.

"Let the gods witness our marriage, Alexander. I think that they have always sought our union. I love you unconditionally. You are a part of me and I can not imagine a world without you in it. I will always love you. I will always be true. I promise you this."

Taking the bread, they broke it between them, taking some and eating it. Then Alexander reached for the flask of wine, opening it and taking a drink from it. He passed it to Hephaistion, watching while he drank and then leaned forward to take a kiss.

Hephaistion tasted of the wine, though the kiss was sweet enough.

"We are married," Hephaistion whispered, when the kiss was broken, as if to say it louder would be to break the spell.

"Married," Alexander said, smiling with his confirmation.

"If anyone should discover what we have done," said Hephaistion, a look of concern crossing his face.

Alexander looked in to the night sky, the stars brighter now. "I hear no rumble across the heavens, no lightening bolt has struck. The night is calm, Hephaistion…husband, I believe the gods approve, with this, more than anything I have done. As for the army, it is the New Year festival, they will be celebrating but, in truth, it will be our wedding feast, although they will not know."

He sighed, transfixed by the sight of Hephaistion, with the garland on his head, his face glowing with the light from the fire, his beautiful eyes so full of love. A sudden thought spurred him in to action and he reached in to the bag, bringing out a small bundle.

"You gave me a ring, saying that it reminded you of me."

Hephaistion reached over and touched the ring. "Of the sun and the stars," he said.

Alexander opened the silk wrapping to reveal a gold ring with a smokey blue stone set in it. "It is a moonstone, of a quality that Artemis herself would be proud to wear. For what are the sun and the stars without the moon? I had it made for your birthday, the setting the same as the ring you gave me, but I want you to have it now as a symbol of our union." He placed it on Hephaistion's finger, pleased when he found it to be a perfect fit."

"In truth, I always think of the ring you gave me as a symbol of our love," he continued. "I needed it that night. I needed to know that you still loved me. I was so absorbed in my infatuation that only on my wedding night did I begin to fear that things might change between us. I was so grateful to have your blessing. Though I think I realised my mistake then…but just too late."

"You must still lie with her, Alexander," Hephaistion urged. "You need an heir."

Alexander frowned. "I would choose not to. But if Roxanne cannot give me a son, perhaps Stateira will."

Hephaistion smiled and nodded. "It has to be that way."

"But I will not lie with other men…or eunuchs," Alexander said, adamantly. "I'll not lie with Bagoas again, not if you were away for a year or more. I can promise you that. I will be faithful to you that way." He looked over to the fire, then back to Hephaistion. "And Craterus' days are numbered with this army…"

"No, Alexander. I wouldn't see anything happen because of me. I should have ignored him…"

Hephaistion's words trailed off as he realised he had admitted, for the first time, who the blame lay with.

"Seleucus told me. Craterus began it. So, Craterus will return to Macedon as soon as I can organise it. It might not be immediately, but it will happen."

Hephaistion's stomach rumbled and he looked on Alexander and smiled.

"And Perdiccas told me you have not been eating," Alexander said.

"I don't need to tell you anything," came the reply.

Alexander looked to the food. "We have our wedding feast before us. Let us eat."

He handed Hephaistion one of the roast partridge, taking the other for himself. With the knot gone from his stomach, with the surety that he was truly loved, the food tasted better than he had ever had. They did not speak while they ate. No words were needed. It was a comfortable silence.

They shared the bread and cheese, ate the fruit and then drank some wine. Then began a conversation about the past, of their first meeting, their times together, before their marriage.

"If I marry Stateira, then I would want you to marry her sister, Drypetis," Alexander said, suddenly. "If you cannot give me sons, you can at least provide me with cousins for my children."

Hephaistion laughed, then took a drink of wine. "So now you are determined that I should have a wife…"

"To know how I feel, having to lay with a woman, trying to sire a child when I would rather be with you."

"And you want me to provide cousins for your children."

Alexander sighed and shook his head. "I feel ashamed enough that I am married to Roxanne. I hurt you by it…I hurt you with the things I do, when I have no intention of causing pain. At least, as my friend…and husband, you should consider my proposal," he said and smiled.

"And what of my proposal?" Hephaistion asked, putting down the wine.

Alexander considered for a moment. "What proposal would that be?"

"That we consumate this marriage."

Grinning, Alexander reached between Hephaistion's legs, stroking him and encouraging the growing erection.

Hephaistion lay back, pulling him with him, seeking his lips and kissing him deeply, sighing and moving in to Alexander's touch, his own hand moving down Alexander's torso and between his legs.

Alexander gasped and broke the kiss as Hephaistion found the spot, just with his hand, with a movement of his thumb, he felt his desire grow. He parted his legs allowing further access, pressing his body against Hephaistion's hoping to convey what he was feeling.

He kissed Hephaistion's body, moving lower, moving between his legs, kissing his inner thigh, then teasing and licking, his eyes watching all the time, judging the reaction and knowing he was giving pleasure. Licking his lips he took Hephaistion in to his mouth, having to put a hand on Hephaistion's chest as he arched his back and thrust forward.

"Alexander…" Hephaistion cried out, as if he might object, as if he thought this was beneath a King. He must have thought better of it, remembered it was Alexander he was with, as he brought his hand up to Alexander's head, encouraging him to continue.

Alexander felt a hand at his waist, guiding him, wanting him to turn. Without stopping what he was doing, he moved so that he was postioned over Hephaistion. He felt his husband take him then and he reacted the same way, thrusting forward and arching his back.

It was good. Perfect. No virgin to initiate. They knew how to pleasure each other, and love was there. A love so strong that they would die for each other.

Hephaistion released him. "You have me close," he whispered.

Alexander moved , lifting himself up, then turning again, kissing Hephaistion's lips briefly before moving again.

Hephaistion parted his legs as Alexander, once more, moved down between them. He lifted himself, wantonly, as Alexander pressed a finger against him, pushing himself down to take it and moving on it. He raised his legs, placing them on Alexander's shoulders.

Alexander needed no further invitation. He did not hesitate, withdrawing his finger and then entering Hephaistion, thrusting forward, holding him, claiming him.

Their lips met, each conveying their need. Hephaistion embraced him tightly, moving with him, but Alexander had other ideas. He slowed his thrusts, controlling the passion, the kisses slowing, being more tender and loving.

"Take me," Alexander murmured.

"I already have, before our marriage," Hephaistion replied, confusion in his eyes. "I love what you are doing, Alexander. Don't stop."

Alexander smiled and kissed Hephaistion's perfect nose. "I would not, and never have, allowed anyone else to take me, Hephaistion. It is our wedding night. I have claimed you, now you must claim me."

"No. Take me first. Come inside of me, Alexander. I am not so old that I cannot take you later. I will revive soon enough." He lifted himself, pushing himself back against Alexander.

Giving a cry, Alexander thrust forward, Hephaistion pulled his legs back, allowing him to go deeper.

"Claim me for eternity," Hephaistion urged him.

"I claim you," Alexander replied, crying out as his feelings overran him.

He heard Hephaistion call out right after.

For a time, neither of them could move. Alexander lay across Hephaistion, listening to his heart, to the fast pulse steady and then slow. His heart sounded strong and he smiled to hear it.

Thinking his partner might be asleep he lifted his head to stare in to the lapis eyes. Hephaistion smiled at him, then helped him to move so that they lay entwined together. Their kisses tender now, hands moving lazily across each others bodies.

"It keeps getting better between us," Hephaistion commented, twisting a strand of Alexander's golden hair around his finger. "You are no longer the boy I knew. I loved him, but I love this man I have before me even more. This man whose body bears the scars of battle, whose eyes show the hardships, the weight of judgements and the loss of friends."

"I almost lost you," Alexander replied.

Hephaistion shook his head. "Never," he vowed. "Even in death I think we will find a way to be with each other."

"I don't know where I would be without you," Alexander said, taking Hephaistion's hand, running his thumb across the moonstone ring.

Laughing, Hephaistion pulled him close. "You would be back at Pella, listening to your mother, married three times over with children under your feet, and Macedonia would have declined back to what it was, with us all herding sheep and bowing to Athens and praying that the Persians don't invade…"

"Stop it," Alexander laughed, tickling Hephaistion, to achieve his goal. "You know that you are lying. Admit it."

Hephaistion wriggled in his grasp. "Alright. Alright. I'm lying. Let me go." He laughed as he pulled away and stood up. "You'd only have two wives, and many daughters, no sons, but you would still be listening to your mother, that much is true."

He ran, knowing that Alexander would be after revenge. He ran in to the water, laughing as he felt Alexander's hands about his waist, as he felt himself pulled under the water. He quickly surfaced. "You know I speak the truth," he grinned, wiping the water from his face and straightening the garland which had become dislodged.

"You think that so many wives…and children, would not drive me out of Pella?" Alexander laughed, helping Hephaistion to his feet. "This is a fine start to a marriage to discover you have so little faith in my abilities," he said, trying to sound stern but unable to hide his amusement. "And where would you be, Hephaistion? Married to the fat daughter of a neighbouring farmer, with ten or twelve fat little children running around your feet, and the highlight of your life being going to the market and growing old with the other farmers discussing crops and goats and horses."

Hephaistion bit his lip, considering what had been said. Then threw his arms around Alexander, pulling him tight. "Thank the gods we found each other," he exclaimed.

Feeling happiness pulsing through him, Alexander held Hephaistion. Here was his joy in life. His reason for being. "We should find the time to be like this," he murmured. "We will make the time to be alone." He kissed his neck, softly, whispering in his ear. "I want you in my bed each night. If I go to Roxanne I want to know that you will be waiting for me."

Hephaistion pulled back, briefly kissing his lips. "When you are spent?" he asked.

"I thought you said we were not so old," Alexander replied.

"I said that I was not so old," Hephaistion said, and smiled.

"But you are older than me," Alexander argued.

"By eight months, that is all."

Alexander pondered for a moment, then smiled. "I have yet to see any proof that you are more virile. You promised to claim me but you have yet to do so."

Hephaistion took Alexander's hand and placed it between his legs. "I think I can keep my promises," he said, softly. "Come kneel on the furs for me."

He ran his hand around Alexander's waist, guiding him from the water, then kissed him.

Alexander melted to his touch, gladly releasing control to Hephaistion. He did as he was bid and fell on to his knees on the furs, bending forward, placing his hands down before him.

Aware of Hephaistion kneeling down behind him, Alexander lowered himself further, offering himself by leaning on his forearms, shivering to the touch of a hand on his waist, moving back towards his hips, parting him, pleasuring him. He felt the warmth of Hephaistion's body leaning over him, felt his soft kisses on his back.

"I want you inside of me," he murmured, smiling at how needy he sounded.

"And this is mine alone?" Hephaistion asked, the sound of his voice seeming to vibrate along Alexander's skin.

"All yours. I would never allow anyone else to take me like this. I love you. I am yours, Hephaistion…"

He groaned then, knowing that his wish had been granted, that he was being entered…taken. He pushed back for more and felt Hephaistion's hand slip around his waist, heard him give a sigh of pleasure as he went in all the way.

There was a moment then, when they held still, like statues, savouring the moment and then they began to move. Hephaistion's hand grasped him, echoing the movement. Like, when they were boys, it did not take them long. Their feelings too near the surface to be held down.

Knowing that Hephaistion had taken his pleasure, Alexander moved in to his touch finding his own release shortly after, only then did Hephaistion withdraw, falling back upon the furs to rest alongside him.

Alexander pulled the furs around them, the fire was growing dim. If he had had the strength or the inclination he would have fetched more wood, but he had no desire to leave Hephaistion and they were warm enough held in each others arms.

Hephaistion kissed him. "Health to you, my husband," he murmured.

Alexander returned the kiss. "Health to you, my husband," he replied.

Sleep came quickly to them, though before he fell in to the arms of Hypnos he gave thanks to whichever god had planned it, that a day that had begun so badly, had ended with such bliss.

When morning came, Alexander awoke to find Hephaistion watching him.

"I wondered when you might wake," he whispered.

"How late is it?" Alexander asked.

"Late enough," Hephaistion smiled. "We will have to get back."

"I don't want to leave this place."

"Then we will take it with us," replied Hephaistion, placing his hand on his heart. "Here. We will keep it here."

Hephaistion reached for the wine and took a sip, passing it to Alexander, who sat up and took a drink, then followed Hephaistion in to the water for a morning bath.

The sun was warm, birds were singing, the sky was blue. It was Elysian Fields placed down on earth.

Alexander lowered himself in to the water, ducking underneath it to wet his hair, suddenly remembering the garland, but when he surfaced he found it was not there.

"Our wedding night is done," Hephaistion said.

He was shaving his face, when he had completed the task Alexander took the dagger from him and shaved his own. When he was finished Hephaistion took the dagger from him and threw it to the shore.

"Happy New Year," he said.

"A new year. A new beginning," Alexander replied. Not able to resist another kiss, laughing inside as he realised that Hephaistion wanted him, happy to oblige, moving behind him in the water and taking him that way.

They dressed, and while Hephaistion fetched the horses Alexander gathered up the furs and picked up the empty bag, placing the wine flask inside it.

Handing him the reins to Bucephalus, Hephaistion leapt on to the back of his horse then waited for Alexander to place the furs across Bucephalus' back before getting on himself. He struggled up, Bucephalus having long since retired himself from bowing down.

"Getting old?" Hephaistion asked, seeing him struggle.

"I'll take you on any day," Alexander said, grinning back. He pushed Bucephalus on, leading the way towards the path, and then up the slope.

He could not resist a final look. "I will have a temple built here, to Aphrodite and Peitho."

Hephaistion looked back over his shoulder, then to Alexander. "Don't you think that will be a little obvious?"

"Let them think what they will," Alexander replied, heading out in to the world again.

They found the men ready to leave. Odius stood in salute as they emerged, though he could not hide a certain amount of relief which flooded his face.

"We have not killed each other," Hephaistion said. "I see you're ready to go."

Odius nodded back towards the camp. "We could hear music, the breeze carried it here.

"Let's get on to the festivities then," said Alexander, encouraging Bucephalus forward in a slow and steady canter.

Hephaistion hung back a little to speak to Odius, leaning down conspiratorially. "I hope you and the men won't consider racing Bucephalus. Give the old horse his due respect and stay behind."

Odius opened his mouth to protest, but no words would come. Hephaistion laughed and turned to go after Alexander.

The guards at the camp were vigilant, but the festivities were in full flow when they returned. They rode in to the centre of the camp, to be greeted by a mildly swaying Ptolemy, a flush-faced Seleucus and Craterus, who stepped back, as if not wishing to be noticed, when he saw Hephaistion ride in alongside Alexander.

Jumping down from their horses and handing the reins to pages, they embraced their friends wishing them a good new year.

Alexander caught Hephaistion's embrace to Craterus and realised that what damage had been done could never be repaired. He knew the cause of it and his decision on Craterus' future was made.

Leaving the others they went in to Alexander's tent, seeing Perdiccas asleep on one of the dining couches. Alexander pushed him with his foot, sending him rolling on to the floor. Perdiccas mumbled some unintelligible word then carried on sleeping.

"It looks like we have a house guest," he remarked, walking quickly through to his sleeping quarters. "I need a change of clothes. Here," he said, throwing a red chiton to Hephaistion."

Hephaistion looked at it with some disgust. "Am I the bride now?" he asked, laughing and throwing it back at Alexander as he turned.

"You were never so petulant before," laughed Alexander, throwing a white one over and choosing a similar one for himself. "You should bring some of your things here now."

He undressed, then, lifting the chiton over his head, went over to Hephaistion who was fastening his own, leaning over and claiming a kiss. "The day will go better if I know you will be in my bed tonight," he said.

He ran his hand up along Hephaistion's face, gazing in to his eyes. He took another kiss, turning Hephaistion in his embrace, deepening it, letting his tongue explore Hephaistion's mouth. "Tonight," he murmured, breaking the kiss, knowing his men were waiting for him.

As he stepped away and reached for his belt he saw Bagoas waiting in the shadows and felt annoyed with him for not allowing him a private moment. He must have seen them kiss, he was always around, when the pages would always know when to make themselves scarce. He craved his time alone with Hephaistion, he did not want any interruptions.

"Go and enjoy the festivities, Bagoas," he ordered. "I shall ask the pages to attend me tonight, and when Roxanne arrives in a few days time I would appreciate it if you would attend on her from now on."

Hephaistion looked surprised by his tone, he turned to watch Bagoas leave, then back to Alexander. "I know your mother and father both taught you not to hesitate, Alexander, but…"

"He's like a shade," Alexander interrupted. "His manners are impeccable but he has no idea when to keep away." He considered for a moment. "Anyway, he is loyal, he will keep me informed of what goes on in Roxanne's mind."

"She won't like that I spend more time with you."

Alexander laughed, as he fastened on his sandals. "That'll be nothing new to you. Just deal with it, Hephaistion, as you always have."

He pulled his best friend, his lover, his husband in to a warm embrace, then took his hand and led the way outside, letting his hand slide around his waist then. Ptolemy led the way to see the play Seleucus' troop had come up with.

A large crowd had gathered to watch it, and a cheer went up when Alexander arrived and took his seat, with Hephaistion right beside him.

The author of the play stood nervously at the side, biting his nails as the play got off to a shaky start, but Alexander was pleased with the way he was interpreted and with the man who was chosen to play Hephaistion. There was a comment as to their actions at Troy and references to Achilles and Patroclus, even during the Issus battle scene, which got a little heated, as some of the men had drunk too much wine, already, and acted like they were out to kill. Unfortunately, these were the men playing Darius and the Persian army, so the battle of Issus was almost lost, unwittingly.

Alexander stood and applauded when the play was done, happy to hand out the prizes and wreaths and encouraging the writer, saying he wished to see more.

Music began to play. Men were dancing and singing.

Hephaistion looked to Alexander, holding out his hand.

"Dance with me," he said.

Alexander could not refuse, he took his hand and walked with him to where a line of men danced. They cheered as they realised the King had come to join them.

He put his left hand on Hephaistion's right shoulder, his right hand on the shoulder of a man he knew was new to the phalanx. The song was a bawdy one, popular in the barracks at Pella, about a man getting married, of the wedding night and his escape to battle. The dance steps were intricate but repetitive.

Alexander could not remember the last time he danced like this. He threw back his head and laughed, then turned to Hephaistion, seeing, for a moment, the boy he fell in love with at Mieza, and then the man he was now. He thought his heart might burst with love and happiness at that moment.

"And though he had a wife, he found a better life, with a lad that he met in the army," the song continued.

The words rang true, though this was no sad love song. He broke his grip on the man to his right, turning to pull Hephaistion in to his arms, kissing him, while it seemed the whole army cheered, the echo ringing throughout the surrounding mountains.

He loved Hephaistion, he wanted the world to know it. Now and forever.

THE END


End file.
